We always begin the Lenten season with the distribution of ashes. The priest traces a cross of ash on our foreheads with the words, "Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return." We are invited to come face to face with the fact that we will die. That can scare us! As the comedian said, " I'm not afraid to die; I just don't want to be there when it happens." For many years as a younger man and priest I was afraid of dying because I envisioned it as coming before God and having to account for all of my sins. I was sure that I didn't deserve mercy and expected only just punishment.
After I receive the Lord in the Eucharist I always pray the Soul of Christ and I have been struck by the last line,
"At the hour of my death call me and bid me come to You that with Your saints I may praise You forever." I now envision my death as waking to see Jesus stretching out his hand to me and saying, "C' mon, Ralph, let's go home."
I have been changed by that prayer and Jesus' parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-24). The son seriously insulted his father in asking for his share of the father's estate. It was saying, "I wish you were dead." The father let's him go and the son wastes the money on selfish pleasures. I picture the father going out every day and sitting under a tree along the road waiting for his son to return. And when he does, the father runs out and meets him with a bearhug and a kiss. There's no judging, no shaming, no questions about the money; there's only love and forgiveness and reinstatement as son with new clothes, sandals and the family ring and the announcement of a huge party. I think that would be worth dying for!
Fr. Ralph Huse, S.J.
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